Porter Taylor

Finding the Way

There is a reason the early Church was called “The Way” and not “The Answers.” When we become God lovers and Jesus followers, then we let go of our egocentric sense of how the world should work and instead listen to the Spirit and, hopefully, take the first step—which is all about embracing your faith.

It’s the Thomas Merton prayer:

“My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going
I do not see the road ahead of me
I cannot know for certain where it will end
Nor do I really know myself
And the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean
That I am actually doing so
But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you
And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing

I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road
Though I may know nothing about it
Therefore will I trust you always though
I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death
I will not fear, for you are ever with me
And you will never leave me to face my perils alone.”

At the age of almost 74 my sense of the ability to affect the world is quite different from when I was 21. I certainly do not see the road ahead of me, nor do I falsely think I can control my or anyone’s life. In addition, the past is the past. Therefore, what I have and all that any of us have is this moment. I am realizing that what is required is a desire not just to hold on to my faith but to deepen it because I realize how much I need God.

When I am actually capable of doing this, I experience a much greater sense of freedom because I am somewhat clearer about what is mine to do, and what is God’s to do. Then I can act because I feel aligned to the Spirit and I am not trying to control the world but just do my part.

I can vote, but I can’t make the person I voted for win the election. I can pray for my children, but I can’t make their lives avoid catastrophes. In addition, I can be kind, but I can’t control anyone else.

However, this is the day the Lord has made, and it’s the only day I have. So, my hope and prayer are to give thanks for tis day; to be as fully present as I can be; and to take on what is mine and offer the rest to God.

As Merton wrote, “Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.”

Because if I am connected to God, what can go wrong?